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I know...

I said I was finished here but making another new blog is so damn tedious and needy, I figured I'd just vent here again. I was going on and on about stupid people and the nonstop flow of them in my life lately, but it occurred to me; it's not so much how stupid people can be but rather how disappointing they are. You get to know people, or at least you think you do, then out of nowhere, they do something so irrational and stupid, you wonder what the hell they are thinking. Then you start to second guess if their friendship was a big goof on you too. Were they simply manipulating you to perform for them by pretending to be your friend? I was never this paranoid before but since I've seen it happen all too many times to both myself and to other people, I don't put it past any asshole to screw with me for no other reason but that they can. So I give no second chances anymore. Either don't be a fucking asshole, or don't come back when you are. I don't feel like playing with people anymore. There are too many more out there to waste time worrying if any one in particular is going to fuck with me. First sign of it and off you go. Find another chump. I have no use for bullshit games. I figure by the time I retire, I should have alienated just about every idiot I ever encountered and will be able to live a long lonely hatefilled bitter life by myself quite happily. People just piss me off. I hate 'em.

Vaginous will soon retire...

Seeing as Vag has run its course and become less and less a part of my regularly maintained web properties, I feel it is time to retire the name and move on. What has begun to bother me most through my web travels is the illusion that others out there actually give a flying fuck about what you have to say. You think you have friends but find most of them are more interested in fucking with you for their own entertainment rather than be entertained by anything you might try to offer them. Ungrateful people come to expect you to provide for them to the point where they take you for granted and ignore your potential needs for some return on your hard work. To the miniscule few who actually have followed this dumb blog for all the years it has been sitting here, I assure you this commentary is NOT directed at you. You folks are the only genuine internet friends I have made. In expanding my horizons, I have encountered some of the most inconsiderate douche bags and dipshits ever to be dropped into human existence. The ones who aren't so dumb only prove to be conniving egotists who have more fun making a fool of you than being a true friend. Funny how this lesson should have been learned 4 years ago when I finally decided my wife was the leader of this army of assholes. But alas, I am the optimist still hoping someone out there can comprehend loyalty and considerate coexistence. Hopeless cause. I surrender to stupidity and self importance. I give up. I officially hate everyone and will only make exceptions on a case by case basis.

So I hope to move on to better things, most likely a clearer display of hostility toward the human race. My racism will still be on display because frankly, what is pure hatred of people without a blatant mix of old fashioned racism folded in for good measure? I don't mean to offend the noble tolerance of my readers, just attempt to educate and expose things I have seen my whole life concerning certain minorities. I plan to focus more on stupid inconsiderate and irresponsible people. Race can be a contributing factor to behavioral patterns of course, but for my purposes here I hope to lump it all into the "stupid fucking people" category equally. If I never had to look at another living human again, I would not be too disappointed.

I will somehow try to contact those who read this regularly to give directions to my new digs when I get around to creating it. I would leave a link here but that would bring some of those who have inspired my disdain for people along to read more of my disgust for them. I apologize if I miss anyone (there are too few for that to be a huge problem) but I know resourceful readers will somehow find me if it is even a priority! Farewell loyal readers!

Safety Board Again...

Safety Czar Krill has voiced his dismay to another employee within earshot of me, the poor dumb bastard. Seems the new dry-erase markers I got have staying power and are difficult to erase! I felt a board addressing his concerns might make him suspect the innocent bystander he was crying to! Also...he has transformed a utility closet on the loading dock into his personal "Safety Headquarters"! Little does he know I have the key. I went in and added a few tidbits of my own to another dry-erase white board he has in there. He uses it to inform himself of what he is doing. Nobody else goes in there (besides me) so it must be for his own reminders. Anyway, he will be incensed when he reads my recipe for Tzatziki Sauce!
Here's the main board. I never got a shot of the colset, but I'll be sure to get that next time too!

The Lost Safety Boards...

Krillionaire!

The big wiener, or whiner, or what ever you call being awarded a $2400 tax bill plus licenses and registrations and maintenance costs that have to be forfeited in two years...The Krillionaire Safety official!

Updates and results...

Well, the Annoy-a-tron was a huge success but ended up annoying unintended victims to the point of full chimpout! If you'll recall, the 2.0 version had bigger everything plus 6 sound choices. After careful consideration I chose the cricket chirp. I replaced the last unit behind the girl's work stations with the 2.0 and watched the hilarity ensue. First chirp one of the girls just about jumped out of her chair. This edition of the A-A-T is very loud and throws a good echo from the I-Beam where it is placed to sound like it could be coming from several different locations. It was beautiful. People came from far corners of the building after the first few chirps looking for the cricket. This lasted all through the day last Saturday. On Monday, our resident colored boy came in at 6, right after the supervisor. A couple of us are in on this joke so we waited patiently. Didn't take long. "Brutha Wauka" heard the first chirp of the morning and shot from his cubicle. In a typically loud scream, "Ana buddy heah dat? sound like a muh fuggen mouse! I was hearin it aw day Satta day. I know we gots mice in heah. You hear it don't you?" Andy said, "I heard a cricket." I said me too. Brutha Waukka says he know what a mouse sound like and that be a muh fuggen mouse got dammit. The boy was on all fours looking for mouse turds until Andy warned him the mouse might jump out at him. OOOWEEE, dang. **CHIRP** Got dammit, there it go again! Some one best take care a that mouse or I'm goin home! I ain't gots ta work in conditions where muh fuggen mice be runnin unda muh feets!

Had to ultimately remove the unit because of the hysterical boon. His buddy, our other token joined in the fight to have the mice removed. Everyone was laughing at them because it was clearly a cricket, but these project dwellers couldn't relate. They knew what mice sound like! Absolutely hysterical to watch. They were terrified!

On a safety note, Krill is getting annoyed with the personal attacks using his name and making fun of safety. Even though I am the only one who updates his safety board, he can't stop whining. If he only knew. He even comes to me crying. "You're here early...you ever see which one of those assholes is writing all over my board?" Nope...they must do it when I'm on break or something! Here are two from this past week...enjoy!