This one requires some background information. You must realize even this guy's friends think he's a dick. His last name is Krill and everyone calls him that out of total disrespect. First line of business is to tell about our nearly bankrupt organization crying poverty to such an extent, they want us to pick up used rubber bands off the ground so we can save money. So they purchase shabby quality Tee Shirts with a company logo on the front and hand them out to every single employee. Keep in mind we employ nearly 800,000 people nationwide. Derrr?
Now Krill, the safety guy. He is an avid listener to some stupid sports talk radio station while he is on his delivery route. He calls in regularly and wins dumb little contests from time to time. This particular time he ended up winning a car! Well...kinda winning a car. He won a 2 year lease. He had to come up with $1,200 sales tax and registration fees, plus a $50 per month tax to cover his good fortune. The guy is ecstatic. I just don't see the glory in winning a $1,200++ bill plus an inevitable end of year beat down from Uncle Sam for taxes he will undoubtedly owe by April 15th. But I digress, the dufus is walking on air! So it's a red Nissan something or other brand new for him and his one legged bride to borrow for a couple of years. Good for him. As for what he had to do to win it, he was required to drive 90 minutes over to Vermont to a Nissan dealer where he and a hundred other saps stood waiting to be the last name standing in a drawing from a hat. Krill was the last one. Krill won the extra expenses! YAY for Krill. He returned to work with all the promotional pictures of him, the car, the oversized banner for the radio station, blah blah blah. He hung it all around his work area not unlike your six year old's crayon stick people drawings on your refrigerator. He looks ridiculous both in the pictures as well as in real life. So with all of this as a preface to showing you the current safety board joke on Krill...I give you the latest photo of the board.
Click to enlarge the picture for easier reading.
3 comments:
I can think of a krillion ways to make fun of this guy for bragging about the new car...but you pretty much covered it.
(couldn't resist)
Holy crap. If I won a contest that said I had to pay $1200 plus another $1200 over 2 years to borrow a stupid car, I would tell them to pound salt.
Yep that new safety board nails Krill as the laughing stock he is.
It's only fitting that he is named after a shrimp-like marine invertebrate animal
Is the guy nuts? I'd return the prize. There are a krillion reasons to make fun of him.
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